Well, I've finally been able to get an appointment with a therapist who deals in woman's abuse. I'm a little scared about it all, but I know I have to go in a talk with her. I contacted this facility last August when things were really, really bad with my husband and his emotional abuse. It's now the end of January.
The abuse phase is okay right now. He's not blatantly mean or abusive, or outside of the realm I've learned to live with. Oh, there are small incidents that arise, but it's not severe.
We are remodeling our other home so we can move back in. Last Saturday evening I asked my husband if John, the guy who's helping us and giving advice, knew what he was talking about. The week prior John had told me something about our kitchen cabinets that didn't seem to make sense. Last Saturday he contradicted what he had said the week before. So yes, I was questioning John's abilities. So what. My husband got really, really pissed and asked what I wanted done with the kitchen. I explained it wasn't about what I wanted done with the kitchen, it was about what John was saying and recommending regarding the cabinets. He again pushed in an angry tone asking what I wanted done and telling me I always change my mind and question things (I think he yelled that). I left the room.
I went to the spare bedroom and slipped under the covers. My husband opened the door and started yelling at me (previously he had been yelling at me from downstairs, expecting me to run to him, but I ignored). He yelled and uttered some bullshit crap and said I should apologize, and that's what's wrong with me - I never apologize for things. What the fuck for? I said, "What? You want me to apologize for questioning whether John knows what he's talking about?" He's out of his fucking mind! Well, he realized that was stupid so then he all of a sudden apologized to me, kissed me and left for his symphony gig.
I swear the man is an emotional midget. Oh, that's besides being controlling, self-centered, narcissistic, and mean.
Wow. Why did I ever marry him? And, why can't I leave?